I did it again!

My Manic Monday started with lots of errands. Bank, Gas (took out a loan for that), quick stop at Target, typical things I guess. I go back home to p/up Kassidi, my daughter, to run yet more errands. On our way back out we throw some left over pizza and their boxes and a bag of trash into my Jeep to dump in the big cans at the end of the driveway. We end up at church with my Hubby recording some music, meet my in-laws there, decide to go with them to lunch. Mom in law drove, I discreetly pop some prozac, we had a fabulous lunch and a few hours later Kass and I get dropped back off at church to get my car.

I fish for my keys, walk toward the car and can't make out a figure in the back seat. I open the door and nearly pass out!!! Something died in here Kass!!! We DO have skunk problems - did one get in here, get stuck, ooze and die?! She looks in from the other side, turns green and says "Mom, you forgot AGAIN!" There sits my trash and pizza! Did I mention it was 97 degrees outside and that I failed to crack any windows! For THREE HOURS!!!

We hop in, she covers her mouth, I try to convince her it's not so bad "I mean Kass, you DO share a room with your little brother." We start for home breaking all posted speed signs, all the windows down, people from behind suddenly backing off, I was Queen of the Road. Then the Caesar Salad's dressing started reintroducing itself and now I'M green! We arrive, dump the toxins, take our pulse and proceed to spray a full bottle of Febreeze in the Jeep!

Friends, I have the memory span of a Goldfish! 5 minutes max! It only takes 40 seconds to get from my house to the trash cans - but 1/2 the time I forget! I have too much on my mind! I read a great post today on Anne's blog re: prioritizing and I quickly became very convicted... So it got me thinking, what do you all do to stay on task? Do you have lists? I tend to fly by the seat of my pants and am finding that's not working too well. Read Anne's post and let her and me know!

Oh The Power!

So one cannot dispute the Power of Prayer or the Power of our Faithful God! My father in law, Kimball, just arrived here in town. My mom-in-law, Lynda, drove down from Eugene today (165 miles) Kimball had to be the passenger for the first time ever. The Doctors took his license away yesterday. I would have loved to be a fly in that car! But did you catch it??? HE'S HERE!!!! Totally amazing! He looks fantastic!

The docs ran a couple CT Scans yesterday and failed to find any clotting in his chest, heart and lungs, or brain. The next step is an MRI. They feel the grand maul seizure could be blamed on one of his many meds or complications from the Lupus. Either way, questions need to be answered and a solution would be wonderful. But having said that...HE'S HERE! I mean really, to what could we possibly attribute his arrival today outside the fact that so many of you are praying for him and God is, yet again, proving Himself to be bigger and badder than I sometimes give Him credit for!

Now, regarding my opening sentence, I must ask my own self a question...Would I be praising God the same right now if the circumstances were different? As God would happen to have it lately in my life, He has been speaking to me very loudly regarding this exact issue - and I have to say my answer is...Absolutely! God is not only faithful, He is just! He is all knowing! His thoughts and ways are higher than ours! I cannot and will not always comprehend His will or orchestration of things. But I do know, that right now- this very moment, is all we're promised! I am sure of this because I'm in this moment. Kimball is here, this moment, this is what we have and know and can count on! I will praise God for this! And only He will get the glory and to Him only it belongs!

We will continue to put our hope in the Lord. We will continue to pray for healing...however, or wherever, God chooses to heal. We trust that His perfect will will continue to unfold...and we wait in expectation...

Thank you for praying for our family! Please continue to do so as you feel lead and know that we are so very grateful!


Here's a face to put with your prayers. This is Kimball and Kota 3 years ago in Maui 3 months after Kimball's quintuple bypass surgery! He's a medical wonder I tell ya!

Please pray...

My father in law, that I mentioned in my Painting and Twila post ,who is retiring from First Baptist just had a major seizure. He was taken by ambulance and is at the hospital now. I will keep you all updated as I get updates. Thank you so much!

I've Been Tagged!

Aahhh, I feel so special! Really! Mandy Tagged me - thanks girl...

Here's how it works. I answer these questions and tag 5 bloggers to do the same. Here goes...

5 things I wanna do before I die:

1- Live
2- Learn to play the guitar
3- See my mom and family come to know the Lord!
4-Know that I have completed the ministry He has given me
5-Eat shrimp again!

5 things I can do:

1-Pop my hips out of joint
2-(long, long pause before coming up with 4 more things) make mean Molasses cookies! (husband groans, oh-yah!)
3-make people laugh! (husband amens!)
4-be a good friend (husband laughs....really!)
5-slap husband and get a way with it!

5 things I cannot do:

1-Not ask someone if they're OK when it looks like they're not.
2-Play guitar...yet
3-the splits
4-go a day w/out dusting or sweeping
5-keep my mouth shut when I see a child being demoralized in public

5 things that make a man attractive to me:

1-SENSE OF HUMOR!!!
2-his smile
3-boldness in his faith
4-plays like a kid with kids
5-when he can laugh at himself

5 celebrities I crush on:

I don't know if I crush on them but they are cute to me
1-Harrison Ford
2-George Clooney
3-Ryan Seacrest
4-Harrison Ford
5-Harrison Ford

OK - that was exhausting! But fun! Thanks for the tag Mandy!

Here are the 5 bloggers I am tagging... Have fun!!!

Solace Girl

God's Gal

My Man

Gretchin

In a Foreign Land

Boycotting Painting and Twila Paris

I used to really love painting the insides of our homes. It was always the cheapest upgrade. In fact, Brent and I painted the interior of one of our homes so many times we joked that we were losing square footage as the walls were closing in on us!

This week we have been painting my in-laws house, which is near us, getting ready for their arrival in October. My father in law is retiring from the Senior Pastor position at First Baptist Church in Eugene, Oregon. They have purchased a home here and are slowly remodeling it. So the fam and I have spent the last 4 days painting away. I haven't painted quite like this since I was diagnosed with Lupus a couple years ago. After holding a paint brush for an hour I couldn't straighten out my poor little knuckles for at least another hour... I wasn't very fast or effective I'm afraid.

Anyway...in the midst of our painting monotony I found my thoughts sitting idly on worthless things. Like, worry. That was a big one for me this week. Maybe partly because I had gone without my hormones for 6 days and I was a little..."blue", but I hid it well - I hope! Oh my goodness - Lupus and taking Hormones - I sound old!!!

Back to the point of all of this. The only Christian music station we could get on the stereo was our local station. In their attempts to please the whole wide range of their listening audience they played every single style of music out there. Hillbilly, opera, country, blues ( very into that this week ) disco, good ole hymns, some modern worship stuff and of course...your traditional contemporary! A lot of that! I heard my fair share of Michael W. Smith and Twila Paris. Enough to last, well, everyone's lifetime! As the 38th Twila Paris song began this afternoon I found myself painting shot guns and guillotines on the wall. I have no opinions on music. Then I started listening to the words of "God is In Control". I know every one of you just sang that melodious title in your head, didn't you??!! Well I can't get it out of mine, thank you very much! But...I'm rather glad about it. She, Twila (we're tight now), kept saying over and over "Why do you worry?, God is in control". Shut up Twila, I'm sulking here! Then I realized, God was actually trying to get my attention here. I mean really, why else would a station play 38 Twila songs if there wasn't some divine intervention going on? That's not really a question...

Normally I don't stew over things or dwell on situations that are way out of my control. Hmmm, maybe I'm wanting to control our situation because I think that God doesn't have control of it. Is it estrogen related? Or lack thereof? When has He not provided for any of us? Are any of us living in poverty? Likely not, we're reading each others blogs on our spendy computers. What is wrong with me? Deep down I know - it's a trust issue. Faith issue. But if I know that - then why is it too often a struggle? Ok, I know that too. Eeewww - I'm just unwilling to believe Him aren't I? What I need is 3 more solid days of hormone therapy.

I feel better just writing it out actually.... Thanks guys! But honestly, who here deals with the same thing from time to time?

What a sight - What a sound!

My daughter and Shell (our, basically, adopted 19 yr old) just walked out to our front porch with guitars in hand. It's after 10 pm, Monday night. The air outside is warm. It's a beautiful summer evening! I am sitting here in the dining room listening to the most beautiful worship music and singing come from underneath the starry sky. There they sit in and under God's enormous and marvelous creation singing to Him a couple love songs! Life doesn't get much sweeter than this!

Shell leaves tomorrow to Indonesia on a missions trip with FCA - Please pray for the lives that will be touched and changed there... And for Shell - she's nervous!

Here's a song Kass, my daughter, and I wrote - "Lead Me On". She wrote the music then we co-wrote the lyrics. She blesses me! Sorry about the wind chimes in the back ground =o

Check'em out!

Happy Monday friends! Wanted to let you know I've added a few great blogs to my list!

First is Solace for the Soul, my friend Amy. We've been friends for 15 years now??? We live 2 1/2 hours apart but have one of those relationships that can go a year w/out seeing each other and instantly pick up where we left off - love it! She's real, genuine, passionate about life and her Creator, and adores her family and ministry. Visit her site and be blessed!


I also added another dear friend of mine who is a new blogger. God's Gal. Deb, is one of my favorite people in the world! Hysterical lady! Deep and goofy wrapped up more perfect together than I've ever seen it! So in love with her God and her family! Has a twisted sense of humor - I like!!! Stop by and say hi!

Then we have From His Pen. This is Bill. You HAVE to check him out. Authentic! Real! Hilarious! Thought Provoking! Why are you still here?.....

Last one for today is my Canadian Beauty, Cheryl at In a Foreign Land. We were actually neighbors 2 years ago for about a year and have talked more since we started blogging just a month ago - so sad. I love her thoughts on life and the wisdom she shares!

I know adding 4 blogs might be a bit much. But I realized today that each morning I go check out all of these sites and am totally blessed and thankful I did. Why am I not sharing them with you? Enjoy!!! Thank me later =)

What Came First?

I spent part of my muggy hot Sunday afternoon hangin' at the County Fair with my Hubby. He's running sound for one of the concert stages this year. Each year Sunday is Free Admission day - so the kids and I said a prayer and headed for some serious over stimulation! First off - are "fair" goers (excluding my family) created in some mad scientist lab on another planet? I go 51 weeks each year without the pleasure of rubbing shoulders with these folks! Which brings me to my second thought - What came first, the Trailer Park or the Tornado? I don't want any hate comments on this one! I am a trailer girl! I lived in a single wide in Missouri far too long and believe I have earned my right to question such things =o Third mind boggling wonder - Am I bad mother for letting my daughter ride the scariest roller coaster at the fair that was assembled in 2 1/2 hours with "6 Finger Eye Patch Jack" at the controls? Or am I just stupid for riding with her?! We blew 40 bucks on 2 rides, one basketball toss, 2 lemonades and 3 teaspoons of mint chocolate chip ice cream in a 16 oz cup! The 4 year old little boy puking on the Tea Cup...priceless! Good times...

Another Head Scratcher

I'm done with the news. I resign to the fact that if something is of life or death mentioning that I should know about, I will eventually find out on the street.

It seems every time I check the news more and more ridiculous "headlines" are making top mention! Today's featured piece..."Prince Charles gives Camilla a Sheep." Oh my goodness! Some one give me oxygen! I can't believe he did such an amazing thing! If only every husband were so thoughtful and in tune!

I'm sorry for the people in Britain who must hear about these jaw dropping details of Royalty's life...I'm sorry a pathetic birthday gift in London made news in my small town...I'm sorry for the sheep.

Sorry for the rant

Divorce could be genetic?

Really now! Everything is a "disease" these days. I saw this on Yahoo's homepage this morning. I kind of skimmed through it, there was an incredible worship song playing in the back ground. But I got the jest of it anyway, I think. Seems the verdict isn't completely in on whether divorce is circumstantial or genetic. They may be leaning more toward circumstance but here's a quote from the article... "It's also not known whether assortative mating is genetically driven and how that might affect children's genetic propensity for stable or unstable marriages." What?!?! I have to admit I needed to look up "assortative" - not proud of that. It's still suggesting divorce could be innate. Let's just label it what it is - a choice. I know, I know - there are factors such as a myriad of abuses, I am aware of that and a child victim of such abuses. But doesn't a man have a choice to not beat the tar out of a woman? Doesn't a woman have a choice not to have an affair? Doesn't a parent have a choice not to abuse their children? Is it really a genetic flaw that our newborns might be inoculated for some day?

I am willing - but not

This afternoon as I sat in a meeting that I barely had time for, didn't find out about until yesterday, struggling to pay attention, when one question posed caught my ear and convicted me immediately. Question: What am I not willing to do that the Lord is asking of me? Doh!

I have pondered this in my head all day and have come to a realization. It would take less time to state what I AM willing to do than what I AM NOT willing to do. Is that pathetic or what? Maybe it's just where I am at today, but maybe not. But here I tried to balance the two...

I am willing to hear God - but not always willing to listen
I am willing to seek God - but not always willing to be found
I am willing to surrender - but not always entirely
I am willing to serve - but not always unselfishly
I am willing to sacrifice - but not always everything
I am willing to trust - but not always believe
I am willing to risk it all for Him - but not always...

I guess I'm willing to be honest....How about you?

Work with me people!

It has been brought to my attention, but unfortunately I have already noticed, that I get more comments on certain posts than others. I think this is funny! I get more comments on my random thoughts than on deep thoughts - I'M DEEP PEOPLE!!! Kidding! Well sort of...

So, here is some deep info for you all...

1- I have nothing....

2- This is gonna take awhile....

3- Got something!

4- I have been widowed...really

Deep question for you?

1- What is your most impossible (nothing is with God) dream?

Deep Thoughts - At least for me...

So I just picked up a book today by Bill Myers titled Eli. I was at the bookstore with my husband who has become an avid reader. He is reading 10 books in 10 weeks. He's blogging about his adventure along the way - cool stuff. I was just browsing behind him when a cool shade of green caught my attention...I pulled the book off the shelf and read this on the cover... "What if Jesus had not come until today? Who would follow Him? Who would kill him?" I had to get it! I can't get those questions off my mind. It's hard to even think about them. OK - so I've just sat here for about 3 1/2 minutes staring blankly at the screen trying to offer some sort of weak, at best, answer but I can't! First of all - to put my mind in the mode of not having had Jesus already and to be introduced to a Saviour for the first time in this world today - yah, see, that thought didn't even make sense! How about this - How would YOU answer those questions? I can't wait to read this book!

The Itch You Can't Scratch?

Eeewww! Just saw a "feminine cream" commercial for, duh, women. They were kind enough to remind us feminine kind that some itches you can't scratch...OK tell that to all the masculine kind! I guess we don't want to embarrass ourselves by scratching so we'll just go in to Target and by some cream! That's not humiliating at all!

Here she is!

My beautiful little niece has arrived. On July 3rd Ava Mayree entered our world! She is stunning!

Little Elliot loves his sissy and has taken on his big brother role rather easily.... Here he is introducing her to God's word - priceless!

Skim off the fat

I was thinking about certain relationships in my life this morning. How some totally bless my socks off, some make me want to commit a crime, some challenge me, and so on... I remember one morning listening to a study by Beth Moore. She was talking about 3 different types of friendships. One's that make you want to be a better person - they inspire you, build you up, are honest, hold you accountable, are godly. Then there are one's that when you're in their presence there's almost an oppression hovering over - somethings just not right, there's never any Godly discussion (even with your prompting) you walk away feeling less of a person, dark, just "off". Beth Moores opinion on that kind is run for your life! Then there is the 3rd kind - the one that I actually found myself running from mostly. The one that, like I mentioned in the beginning, make you want to commit a crime. The relationships where you find yourself saying, "they just bring out the worst in me." Well get ready - and Praise God! You've got to be kidding right! Unfortunately this makes so much sense. You have that friendship in your life right now don't you? The one that causes you to think terrible things, leaves you impatient, gossiping, you know! Good - consider that relationship a gift - take all those bad things it brings out, recognize them, pray over them, deal with them, conquer them and be a better person because of it. It's like boiling fatty chicken. The longer it boils the more fat and impurities come to the surface. In order to get the best juice and stock you need to skim off all the impurities that have risen to the top. That's what we need to do in these situations too... see it for what it is, skim it off and enjoy some chicken...just a thought!

Are you regular?

My son just informed me he heard that people over a "certain" age who eat french fries stay regular. I asked, "what age?" "Ummm, it rhymes with nerdy" Gee thanks dude! Fries anyone?

Prayer in the Journey...

Hey friends and family! I need your help. Some of you know that I am in the process of writing a book. I have been at it for 4 plus years now. It's on a very sensitive subject - please email me for details if you're interested (I have a good reason for this) but I'd love to share about it with you! I'm asking you all to pray over this venture & for me in this journey. This is a project I am passionate about completing and know it will minister to many women and young girls. The prayer needs are endless. Those of you who are writers understand this I'm sure! I just want to submit this entirely to the Lord. Lay it at His throne and have Him direct and lead as he sees fit. I want to be faithful to "complete the ministry he has given me" 2 Tim 4:5.

Thank you all - I will give updates along the way!

A Front Porch View

We had an incredible Thunder Storm last night here in the Valley! Lightning strikes so fast and furious that when Brent was attempting to photograph them he would miss them by a fraction and as the camera was processing another awesome wonder of God would shoot down from the sky! Which made me think of a verse...

Job 36:32 "He fills his hands with lightning bolts and hurls each at its target."

Some things I can't even wrap my head around...

Hugz Are Still Free

Ahhh...These are the days I cherish! He still holds my hand. Loves to "nuggle". Can't wait for bed time prayers. Is sure to tell me often that he'll never leave me or ever break my heart. He tells me I'm pretty. And when he gets rich he's gonna build me the biggest house ever! He loves to make me laugh. Hugz me in public and reassures me he always will.... I hope so....

The Birds & the Bee's...and Wrestling?

I thought long and hard for 2 minutes on whether or not I should share this. My conclusion...I should!

Ten year old boys just know everything about everything these days! It was one of the funniest moments of my Mommy-Hood life. And scariest. The kids, a family friend and I were watching T.V. when a sexually suggestive commercial came on. I clammed up on behalf of my son, Kota, as I sneaked a glance over at him just in time to catch him sinking into the couch with his face buried in his hands. I giggled and asked if he was ok. "No mom! That's gross! It's sex!" "Well Kota, no, they're just showing a little affection toward each other." Trying to make light of it. But while we're on the topic...I peek over to see the look on my friends face that was screaming "Please don't ask!" I asked anyway..."So Kota, do you know what sex is?" Oh my goodness, I was so not ready for this one! He instantly gave me that HELLOOOOO look and nonchalantly replies..."Yah, it's rubbing and preferred wrestling". Off the chair I go!!! You couldn't have paid my friend or I a million bucks to stop laughing. To add to his disturbing reply, he actually motioned the rubbing! Which, by where his hands were placed, it appears the outside of a womans shoulders are very appealing to boys his age. What have playgrounds turned into! Perplexed by our reaction he chimed in between our outrageous laughter to say, "Dad really needs to talk to me about the birds and the bee's mom." In walks Dad....

What? It's NOT about me!

Have you ever cried out to the Lord, “Why me?” I’m certain you have a time or two. Have you ever gone through a tough circumstance and wondered what its purpose was? Are you still wondering today? Have you ever considered it might not be about you at all? So many questions, so little space to write…

I certainly don’t have all the answers to life’s tough questions but I have learned often times God asks me to endure opposition or hardship for another’s benefit. Well why would He do that when He can speak directly to that person if He wanted to? Well He is…through me.

There have been times in my life when a friend has come to me to say how much God had spoken to them through what I was going through at that time. It usually isn’t until that moment I can see what the Lord was doing. All the questioning comes to a stop and all I’m left with is Praise. This brother or sister in Christ needed to hear from or see God in some way but maybe wasn’t quite ready personally to “get it” on their own. So God used me. I think about all the complaining and stubbornness that had poured out of me and in an instant turns into humility. I realize it is an honor that God would see fit to use me, to speak through me, to count on me to be open and willing to work through me to reach someone else.

Who am I that I should not endure a little discomfort and be used by God? Jesus endured a lot for me. He certainly didn’t have to die a brutal death and could’ve escaped it all if He wanted to. He could’ve walked away and never looked back. But He couldn’t get me, or you, out of his mind. He saw the big picture and though it was for the benefit of the lost, still He gave up His rights for us. Those are footsteps to follow. I have to remember sometimes not to ask “Why me?” but ask “Who for?"

Hey friends and family. I am very excited about this book that is in the works! The author is Anne Jackson. She is writing about church burnout. How it can and does effect Pastors, their families and volunteers. There is a place on the website to take a survey. I took the survey as the wife of a Pastor. It is very in depth and somewhat personal - but the info. is crucial to Anne's research. I am asking any of you who run by this post to check it out and share it with anyone you know who is related to ministry in any way. And please take the survey if it applies, Anne needs more family members to take part in the survey. Thanks alot!

Autograph Please...

Hey friends! I have an autograph book for you all to sign. I found it on a new blogging friends site this morning. You'll find the link somewhere below my profile there on the right. Wow - now that was technical for ya! Have fun with it!

Personality Test

This test was great to take. I found it on a great blog! I have taken the DISC personality test before but, in my opinion, this is much better - and the results were definitely me. However, I certainly don't feel quite as manly as it stated - clearly they're measuring something I'm not aware of (no pun intended, really!) But they're the experts! Here's the link. You should be able to see my test results. If you wanta take your own simply click on the DNA logo at the top left. Have fun!

I want her crib back!

Where did she go? My little girl? My first born? When did this happen? I must be coming out of the longest blink in history! My daughter, 13 years old, just left for 2 weeks to camp. She's been to camp many times before. But for some reason this time is really getting to me. Maybe because I'm too aware that I'm getting closer to 40 and she's getting closer to High School. Very sobering. I stood on our front porch as she drove off with the Grandparents as I bawled like a lost child in the supermarket. We live on 2 acres and have quite a long driveway. I was waving furiously as they turned on to the road repeating to myself "Please let her see me - Please let her see me." They started around the curve of the road, the car just out of view and my heart sank. Then the most beautiful sound...3 taps on the car horn. Three taps as if to say "I" "Love" "You"... She saw me!

My nephew has something to say...

I have a new baby sister! She came yesterday, July 3rd. She's small, 6lbs 6oz and 18 1/2 inches. My name is Elliot. Sissy doesn't have a name yet!

Update: Sissy got a name tonight...
Ava Mayree!

ADORABLE!

They're the best!

Moved To Tears

Have you ever been moved to tears by a piece of music? I certainly have. Being a writer I am extremely vulnerable to uncontrollable outbursts of tears. You know the artsy person syndrome. My daughter is also a very creative little gal. There isn’t anything she attempts that she cannot figure out and do well. She expressed interest in the guitar two and a half years ago after having taught herself to play the piano. She has now taught herself to play the guitar…quite well I must say. She’s even giving me lessons! Not a day goes by in the Hodge Household that there isn’t music playing. Our son will be beating the drums to his own tune and Kass will walk around like Neil Diamond serenading us in any room we’re in…often.

One evening before bed Kass wanted to show me one of the songs she had written. Naturally I say yes. So she sits on the edge of the couch crosses one leg over to rest her guitar on and begins to play. Instantly the melody catches me; sends shivers of blessings all over. Then her lyrics rang out…so deep for such a young one. I marveled as I witnessed this gift from God with a talent so big you cannot dispute that there is a Creator. I began to cry. I was overwhelmed with the depth of this child. What really caught me was her appearance. She wore unmatched jammies, the bottom of the foot of her crossed leg was speckled with several shades of dirt…well earned from a hard days play. Her hair was ratted from just being let out of a pony tail and there was a bit of dried toothpaste on the corner of her mouth from having just brushed her teeth. All the while, singing a praise song to Jesus. It was this entire picture that captivated me and compelled me to tears. From this little child, who is not the least bit concerned with her outward appearance but very aware of and attuned to the God who lives within her, sings to me a love song for her Creator! All she wanted to do was express her gratitude through the gift of music. To share it with anyone she could. To be a good steward of what the Lord has given her. She ministered to me and didn’t even know it. Wow! Moved to tears by a piece of music and later to my knees in awe of the Giver.